The Alhambra

The Alhambra

We’d been told in advance and I’d read on Viritualtourist.com that it was best to buy tickets to get into the Alhambra in advance. They only take a certain number of visitors per day and once they reach it, they stop selling the tickets.

Before we hit the road, I’d checked into buying them online but I could only buy them for the next day. So, we figured we’d just take our chances.

Once we got there and parked, we wandered up to the ticket windows and started waiting in line. It was probably about 3:30 now.

Michele has this thing about eating these little tuna packets when she wants a snack. And she does it without a fork or spoon. It’s weird. She opens the top, rips the packet down the sides so the can open it further and proceeds to stick her nose and mouth into and starts chomping like a horse.

OK, I made that up. But she does do it without a fork or spoon. She takes the top of the packet she ripped off to open and tries to spoon it out with that. Oh yeah. Tuna smells. Bad. But we all know that.

So we’re standing in line smelling like fisherman who have just spent the day out on the ocean casting nets for dolphin when Michele wipes the tuna off her nose and says “Man, wouldn’t it be bad if we got up there and they just ran out of tickets.” Grabbing a napkin and wiping tuna off her chin I responded that I could see the window just closing and we’re left standing there by ourselves.

Wasn’t more than a minute or two later, one of the English-speaking employees walks down the line and says “There are only 12 more tickets to the Alhambra. The rest can buy tickets only for the gardens outside.”

The 3 of us just kinda half-smiled at each other. There were only about 6 people in front of us so we felt we’d be ok. And we were. We got our 3 tickets.

In a lot of these attractions in Spain, you can rent a little hand-device that tells you in your chosen language what you are looking at. It has a set of numbers on it and you press in the number and a voice tells you that this big wall of rocks was built in the 12th century by a philandering monarch to try to win back his wife the queen after he fathered 40 kids out of wedlock in a 3 week span.

I like getting these so I have an actual idea of why I’m even visiting the place. So I walked over to get one. Z and Michele stayed near the gate and started up a conversation with two Australian guys. I got my “I’m a stupid tourist and I’m paying for crap” hand-speaker-doomsday device and walked over and met the two guys. Both their names were Andy.

The 5 of us walked and they said that they were back-packing across parts of Europe before they had back to school; Andy1 to finish law school and Andy2 to finish a degree in Sports Medicine. We walked through the first few parts together and I would listen to my space radio and tell them what it said we were looking at.

We wandered into a garden and in the back of it was a large pit, about 15 feet in diameter and deep enough and dark enough that we couldn’t see the bottom. And it actually had a sign that said “Do not jump in.” The sign was only written in English. Think about that.

I decided to have fun and held my magic talking box up like I was listening to it and said “Oh, it says this is where the kings would sacrifice their blonde virgins in order to please the God they worshipped. They’d strip her down and chase her until she fell into the pit.” We all got a chuckle from it. Then a German guy walks over and asks me to repeat what it was because he wanted to know.

The 5 of us continued through the different parts of the Alhambra which is actually more like a fortress with many different things inside, like gardens, a palace or two and some large towers. The views from the towers were great and we took a lot of pictures.

Before I get into Michele and the Australians, I want to explain why Michele gets mentioned so much. Michele is entertainment all by herself. Tons of energy and a bright personality (that’s not me avoiding saying she’s ugly or anything. She’s anything but). Z and I had joked at one point that we could have just stayed in Moron and kept buying her coffee and it would have been great entertainment and far cheaper.

I could tell right away when I first walked over to Michele and Z talking to the Aussies that Michele was a bit taken by Andy1. And why not? He was tall, dark and handsome. He also had that accent which chicks just dig.

Now, trust me. Michele isn’t the kind of girl who must be the center of attention or anything like that. But watching her talk to Andy1, was just amusing in and of itself. I’m not sure she remembers anything about the first 2/3 of the Alhambra when the Aussies were hanging out with us.

We parted ways with the Aussies a bit later (the truth is they disappeared. It had to be the fact that we smelled like we’d been on a fishing trawler and instead of listening, I was starting to talk into my teleportation/information device).

The last part of the Alhambra was the palace. About 2/3 of it was built by the sultans when the Muslims ruled this part of Europe. The last 1/3 was built by Charles (the 5th, I think). It was amazing the difference between the two parts in style. The Muslim side was a lot of plaster and ceramic and very beautiful. The Christian side was also beautiful but dominated by wood; the ceilings, the walls etc.

I’ll have pictures within a week, I hope.

And tomorrow, it’ll be me tumbling down the slopes, a bratty kid getting what he deserves and sunburn.

Score: Ang 7, Joe S 6, Sis, 6, Sis-in-law 4, Tara 4, Sarah 4, Pops 3, Carly 3, Heather S 2, Me 2, Chad 1.